Hustler's Avatar Na'vi Fleshlight

The exclusive Alien texture combines the feel three our most popular textures to create one out--this-world experience. Tantalizing sinews swirl together mimicking our famous Vortex canal before breaking through to a Lotus node that finally gives way to our most intense texture, the STU.
I'm not gonna lie, I felt dirty just reading that. You can buy the sadness alone for $75, or get it and the movie and two pairs crappy 3-D glasses for $90.